The Days without Mirror (Part 30)

Until the fortieth day of Hosseins death the condition of Mohammad Reza was the same. He cried every day, looked for Hossein, phoned him and said, ‘Why Babahosseins cellphone is off? Someone goes to God and asks him, is it possible Babahossein talks to us?’ I was becoming worry about him little by little. He had a sense of hostility towards God. We could not name God at all before him.

The Days without Mirror (Part 29)

Hossein was managing director of our complex building. We handed the checkbooks and all documents to Mahmoud. Ali phoned Mohammad Rezas grandmother and told her the story. Then he took Mohammad Reza to her house. Pari put a pillow in the living room and I lay down. From 6:30 a.m. phone calls began; my siblings, my mother, relatives... At eight am, people had come and sat down on the stairs. Nobody could believe the news.

The Days without Mirror (Part 28)

On Saturday, 8th August, after finishing work in the office of complex building, Hossein had gone to computer shopping center, opposite to Milade Noor about 10:00 pm and had bought a computer for Mohammad Reza. A young man was also with him when he came back home in order to set up the computer. It was eleven o clock at night. ‘Hossein, you are so tired,’ I said, ‘your eyes turned red.’

The Days without Mirror (Part 27)

I was deeply depressed with my fathers death. I cried nights and days up to seven months. Hossein did not leave me alone for a moment. He advised me, ‘Let us take you to your sisters home; let us go to Behesht-e-zahra cemetery, perhaps you calm down there.’ He recited the prayers he knew for having patience and after each blew at me in order I calmed down. This was the first death that I experience among my family.

The Days without Mirror (Part 26)

One day, Mohammad Reza told Hossein that Nima Ahmadi beat him up in the kindergarten. This story repeated two or three times. ‘Manijeh, tell the story to the principal when you went to the kindergarten.’ Hossein said. I told him, ‘Hossein, this is not something I should tell the principal. These things happen among kids. Be sure Mohammad Reza is not a kid to let others beat him up. If that boy has beaten him, ...

The Days without Mirror (Part 25)

Sometimes I thought that the existence of Mohammad Reza was somehow made distance between Hossein and me. Hossein spent much time for Mohammad Reza, almost all the time he was at home. When Mohammad Reza slept after lots of playing, Hossein was so tired of accompanying him in playing that had no energy. So, he immediately fell asleep because of fatigue and I knew that tomorrow we had a busy day again.

The Days without Mirror (Part 24)

Two years after Hossein returned home, Ali got married in 2000. Perhaps because of social conditions of that time, and seeing some women and girls whose hijab and manner of behavior caused Hosseins surprise and suffering, as well as his emotional conditions that caused he has willed Ali got married sooner. I opposed Alis marriage at the age of twenty two. It was too soon for him. He still did not have a picture of life partner.

The Days without Mirror (Part 23)

Early on, Ali felt strange to Hossein. He called his father, ‘Hossein’; as if he could not easily call him, ‘father’. I realized that he wished to hug and kiss Hossein, but something prevented him; neither Hossein had seen and felt Ali is growing up, nor Ali had never understood who his father was and what his feeling was to him. They could not attract each other. I and Hossein were wife and husband.

The Days without Mirror (Part 22)

During ten years of living with Hossein these nightmares continued and never ended. I was using sedative since I was thirty-three, but Hossein refused to use it; instead, he sought help of smoking. Sometimes, I woke up at midnight and saw that he has sat on the edge of bed and was busy smoking. He got up a few times during the night and repeated it.

The Days without Mirror (Part 21)

Like a hotel, the door of our house was open twenty-four hours for a week. We had collected all furniture and tables and taken them to our neighbors house. I slept in the kitchen at nights. With a pillow and a blanket, I cowered in a corner. Although we provided foods outside home, but I did not have enough time to entertain the guests with tea and fruit and pastry.