Memoirs of Marzieh Hadidchi (Part 5)

2017-8-22

Memoirs of Marzieh Hadidchi (Dabbagh)

Edited by: Mohsen Kazemi

Tehran, Sooreh Mehr Publications Company

‎2002 (Persian Version)‎

Translated by: Zahra Hosseinian

Marriage, the Beginning of Emigration

I was just a teenage girl when I got married. It happened so quickly. The suitor was a friend of my father; therefore, he was backed up by my father's support and satisfaction.

Mohammad Hassan Dabbagh bought his books and stationery from my father's shop when he was studying. My father did not deal with young students, but on the advice of Dabbagh’s father, he provided his stationary wares and books and then settled up with his father at the end of each month.

His coming and going to the bookstore made my father to know this young man. The suitor was from Hamedan, but, because of some problems occurred in tanned leather trade he had migrated to Tehran and worked as an errand-boy. When he decides to get married, he sends someone to speak with my father that if my father permits, he comes to ask for my hand. As he was in Tehran, he sent his sister, son-in-law, and mother to our house, and very quickly the two families got familiarized with each other and the promises were given.

Our wedding ceremony was not like today ceremonies. It was hold very simple and austere, with minimal expectations. In addition to a volume of holy Quran and a set of mirror and candelabras, one thousand Tomans and five Mithqāl (unit of weight nearly equal to five grams) of gold were determined as my Mahr (dowry).

One afternoon a very simple and small ceremony without any luxury was held with the presence of close relatives of both families. The groom and I were not together at the Table of Wedding and even when the wedding vows were exchanged, I did not see the notary, and did not sign any document. "Are you willing to marry Mr. Mohammad Hasan Dabbagh and give the notary power?" my uncle came to me and asked. And my elder sister and uncle's wife dropped me a hint and I answered, "Yes!"

After the ceremony, they took me to the house of my husband's sister. I had more than fifteen years age difference with my husband; and for this reason, it was difficult for me to understand some issues at the beginning of the marriage. I, as an inexperienced little teenager with a hyperactive nature, should be the companion and wife of a seasoned man.

By seeing my husband's first reactions, I realized that living with him is a great opportunity to know myself and the world around and to get closer to God. I lost my heart to him who had lost his heart to me, and we both became of one mind for God.

In November of 1954, after five days of married life, I had been so calmed that went to Tehran with him to continue our new life. This migration was the beginning of future emigrations and more transcendental destinations.

Knowing my husband's record and background pleased me. Although he had a lot of family problems due to the fatherless, he participated in political meetings of that time (the period of emergence and falling of Dr. Mosaddeq), and his participation was because of his religiousness and his working in market and also his suitable intellectual and spiritual views. He read leaflets and declarations and was informed of news through his friends in Qom seminary, and participated in some gatherings and demonstrations. Given to his extensive communications, he exchanged letters among the fighters in the bloody events of June 5, 1963. Also in 1965, he visited some members of Confederate Groups who were in prison for the assassination of Hassan Ali Mansour.

After Imam's arrest and exile, the activities of my husband became more limited. On the other hand, with the beginning of my political activities, one of us should have spent more time with the family, and therefore this role was implicitly undertaken by him.

In Tehran, we lived for a short time at a rental house in Khorasan Street. Thank to God, two years later, we bought a house in the Ghiasi Street (Shahid Sa'idi) and moved there.

Religious Studies

Immigration to Tehran and living in a new environment, in that particular social and political situation, was an opportunity for me - who was full of emotions and curiosity- to know myself and to search for answers for my countless questions.

Due to the lack of facilities for corresponding, the lack of mass media, and the absence of suitable ground for women's various activities, my countless questions increased. Questions such as, why is it not possible for girls to continue studying or if it is possible it is in difficult situations? Why girls should not choose their husband? Why facilities for social activities are not the same for men and women? Why all laws have been legislated in favor of men? And so on.

Even my father and my husband could not find appropriate answers to these questions. Finally, my husband found a solution for me. "I can’t answer your questions; you have to see someone who can do it," he explained, "someone who can understand your questions. You yourself should start religious studies and find answers to your questions by searching and inquiries; also you should understand what the views of Islam, Qur'an, tradition and custom are. You have to strengthen yourself in foundation and detect your lost."

These talks continued between us until one day one of our neighbor's men told my husband: "let your wife go with my daughter to attend the local mosque leader prayers’ lessons and study." My husband, when he came home and told me the subject, asked, "Do you want to do this?" I willingly said, "Why not?"

This was the beginning of a movement in my life, a milestone that provided an opportunity for the emergence of my hidden talents and potentials.

The late Haj Agha Kamal Mortazavi, the imam of local mosque, first taught Al-jame-atul Moghadmat and then logic.

I was looking for studies, while had three daughters. It was necessary to be adequately and sufficiently careful about their upbringing. Children's upbringing, housekeeping, shopping, cooking, and entertaining guests who came sometimes from Hamedan, created a difficult situation for me. But I was pleased to deal with them, because my soul was satisfied; and I continued my studies with great love until we moved to our new house on Ghiasi Street (Aref intersection). With three little kids and also the far distance from the place of my studying, I was no longer able to go there. Therefore, I postponed my study. Then I found out that Haj Sheikh Ali Khansari was the Imam of Salman mosque. I visited him and asked to follow my lessons in his classes. He accepted and again I began my studying. In addition, I could participate in prayer and Qur'an sessions which were held in the house of Ali-Khansari by his wife.

Many concerns and more importantly dealing with the affairs of the children did not create an interruption in my course. Thanks be to God for strong motivation I felt for studying well. Therefore, my teacher was so pleased that asked me to teach his students, and he himself only taught me and two other ladies.

To be continued…