We were cut off guard; we were not prepared for such a war at its onset

Interview & Compilation: Sarah Reshadizadeh
Translated by: Natalie Haghverdian

2015-9-27

Note: Residents of border areas would hear sounds from borders all their life and sometimes these sounds were repeated for so long that no one could even foresee the onset of a war. First days of war narrated by a woman who was born and raised in Abadan are described as follows: we were in shock and perplexity, with sounds coming from the other side of the border, a war started and continued for 8 years in violence and brutality. Soheila Farjamfar, a girl who was raised in Abadan and later she served in the air force base in Dezful as a nurse, describes the war as it happened in Abadan and Dezful.

Let’s start with the content of “Vagrant Shoes”, what motivated you to write the book and how long did it take?

I started in 2000; the main reason was that I thought, with positive or negative perceptions towards war, anyway this important event (war) occurred in our country and inevitably we had to defend and that’s why it is called “Holly Defense”; we have to talk and write about it. The book was introduced to the market in 2002 and received three awards in various festivals shortly after.

On the other hand I wanted to highlight the role of women in war; the combatants in the war were fighting hard and their biographies, memoirs and the stories of their dedication are published; however, this doesn’t apply to women. Once, a friend of mine said something which was a trigger for me.  

He said: when you don’t write about your efforts, what do you expect of others? We witnessed that women were serving behind enemy lines, they were making clothes and food or compote and they would send them to the fronts. Is this really the only role you served?

I replied: No! We were active in whole other places especially in hospitals alongside doctors. This was a trigger and I started writing this book.

In your biography I read that you were born in Abadan and your family was there on the onset of war, tell us about the first days, and how the war was?

My husband and I with my two children, one at the age of eighteen months and the other one a newborn, used to live in Vahdadi interceptor air force base in Dezful. Couple of days before the war my mother called and said that my high school friend is getting married. She asked us to go there and we didn’t know what is going to happen so we travelled with our children to Abadan and my husband was supposed to join us in the weekend; less we knew what Saddam had planned for us.

There were sounds coming from the border but as children of border in areas it was normal to hear such noises and we never perceived them to be serious but then we witnessed the change.

My parent’s house was behind Abadan refinery; it was hit during the first days and there was this thick smoke in the air. We were asked to evacuate the buildings; Iraq had bombarded the refinery, but we stayed for a while and we thought it is still not serious and everything is going to be fine; however, when we saw the images as broadcasted from Iraq’s TV we realized that we can’t stay.

I have to say that then during sultry days we could watch both national TV channels and the foreign ones and what we saw on Iraqi TV were horrifying. We could see that Iraqi’s have invaded Khoramshahr and ransacked houses.

 Due to close proximity of Khoramshahr and Abadan which entails one square, my father, brother and aunts husbands decided to send women and children to a safe place and they stayed behind. I hopped into a car with my mother and my children and left the scene. Of course, those days, Ahwaz-Khoramshahr road was brining under fire and we heard that even civilian cars were attached and women and children were taken hostage. So we travelled through Bahmanshir road and went to Behbahan. During the first months of war, cities in Khuzestan were safe. I left my children with my family in Behbahan and as a matron of air force hospital I went back to Dezful to treat the injured with my husband.

Considering that there were movements in Abadan and Khoramshahr prior to onset of war; people didn’t guess or there were no rumors of war?

We could hear sounds coming from border outposts, but no one could guess that with these random sounds there is going to be such a massive and brutal war which continued for 8 years and not only Khuzestan but other cities suffered strikes. People thought that they would leave the city for a while and they will come back again.

Tell us about nursing the injured and their emotional status during the first days? How were you emotionally? Were you scared?

I think people were cut off guard. No one was prepared for such a war during the first days. During next years, war was more organized but on the onset no one was prepared and that’s why Khoramshahr fell. In the first days only people and local forces were defending against the enemy.

In the books we read that in the first days people were in shock and perplexed and we shall not forget that Bani Sadr was the president at the time and we were not organized but people were empathetic and sympathizing.

I remember that on 2^nd of Mehr (second day of school year in October) there was a meeting in the Department of Education in Abadan to plan for the school year considering the situation when a strike took place and what was left of those in that meeting was a bunch of bones; nevertheless, people were empathizing and helping. Ambulances were cruising in the cities and asking for public support for blankets and bed sheets. I remember that when I went to Shir Khorshid (Sun & Lion) hospital in Abadan which was later named Shahid Beheshti (Martyr Beheshti) it was full of injured people.

When did you return to Dezful?

Immediately after leaving Abadan, when I got to my aunt’s house in Behbahan, I left my children there and returned. I couldn’t go back to air force base with children. From the onset of war, Dezful air force base was designated as battle front and personnel were requested to evacuate women and children. When I returned there was strong military presence in the base and there were a few women left and there was no sign of the previous warm and friendly environment.

Women in the base were two categories. Some were nurses and the others were in telecommunication. The enemy would strike the base right from the beginning of war since they knew that phantom and S4 aircrafts take off from that base and were trying to demolish the base.

We were supporting Hamzeh Division 21 of the military and choppers and ambulances used to constantly transport the injured to the base. We were working non-stop and the only resting time was when we were exhausted and used to take off in turns for couple of hours and then we would return to surgery or emergency rooms.

Dezful base was five kilometers from both Dezful and Andimeshk; considering that Dezful was under strong missile strike, not only Hamzeh Division 21, we used to treat the injured from Dezful and Andimeshk.

How was your emotional status and that of those women in the base?

Most of us were mothers and missed our children; however, such feelings wouldn’t interrupt our duties and we felt responsible to support the injured and medical staff to promote their spirit and I think that in those critical moments of war and violence, women’s role and their compassion and empathy improved the situation.

These feminine features such as compassion and empathy or fear and worry wouldn’t hinder your work?

Look! While swimming in the river, it is not possible to go against the flow. Once you are in a stream that life and death hangs in there and you see that patients, combatants and the injured are all moving in one direction, you can’t move in the opposite direction.

All these make you stronger. Under normal circumstances a patient is a patient but when you look at them and see people of your city or country and all are there to defend this land; you can’t be indifferent.

At this point a patient on the bed is not only a patient and you think that your father or brother or even you yourself could have been there.

I think that such incidents bring people closer. All of us wear a mask in the routine of life but when we face war and bloodshed and martyrdom and injury, the masks go away and all remains is the real self.

There is also the fact that we were all nurses with a scholarship from air forces and our study was supported by public funds and we were trained for such events by air forces. We thought at the time that these trainings are useless but then we had to apply our learning.

How long did you stay in air force hospital?

I was in air force hospital during the first years of war; until Bani Sadr was removed from office and Mr. Khamenei became the president. Then we were told that those who had served in the fronts can apply to be transferred to other cities and considering that my husband and I were both in air force hospital, the head of hospital told that I can go with my children but my husband had to stay.

I transferred to air force hospital in Tehran and after a while my husband’s transfer application was approved and he joined us.

Indeed there are cases under treatment whose memories are significant. Tell us about them.

I remember that during the first days of war we still had no idea what war is and what does breaking sound barrier mean and many other expressions were not familiar.

During the first days of war we could see the Iraqi air forces flying to Abadan and striking and people drowning in blood.

When I was in Dezful air base we had to check the wards on a daily basis to record their needs.

One day, in one of the wards, they told me that an Iraqi hostage pilot is in the hospital. When I went into his room I had a very bad feeling and I wanted to suffocate him because of what they had left many women and children orphan.

Then I thought that I’m a nurse and I’m under oath; and as the Prophet had said and we were taught at school, we have to be kind to hostages.

Anyway, I approached the hostage and I saw that his skin is swollen because of the serum. I treated the swelling and since he looked pale I gave him a bit of syrup. Then he said something in Arabic. I told him that I don’t speak Arabic.

He asked if I speak English. I had studied couple of credits English so I said yes. Then he said: “I’m your enemy, why are you taking care of me?”

I replied: “I’m a nurse and there is no discrimination in my profession. He responded in Arabic: bravo! I’ll never forget his face.”

Later, when peace prevailed and Iran-Iraq relations improved I kept thinking that it is good that I treated that hostage well; at least there are some good memories.

We didn’t discriminate Iranian and Iraqi wounded warriors.

You are one of the women in the war; why is it in your opinion that women don’t talk about war?

I think we haven’t been active in this field. Even women who were in forefronts or those serving in hospitals; it might be that young generation is not interested in reading but they like movies and I think that we have to highlight women’s role in our movies and series.

I see that in movies and series, women’s role in war is not highlighted and usually is summarized as those holding water and the Holy Quran, while sending their children or fathers off to war or providing support behind fronts.

We don’t see movies that really explain women’s role in the fronts. There were women who would cook and distribute the food trench by trench. We don’t see that how can we expect third and fourth generations to know these things.

I believe that women’s role in war is not represented fully in visual industry.

Do you have memories of injured women transferred to your hospital for treatment?

Yes! We were supporting Dezful and Andimeshk and we used to receive pregnant women or those who were injured due to 9 meter missiles striking old and tiny seven meter width streets of Dezful. The streets were so narrow that sometimes the missile would enter from one end and exit from the other.

In your memoir you have covered different subjects including marriage in the hotel hosting war stricken displaced people. Tell us about that hotel. Where was it?

One of my high school friends was in that hotel and she got married there. The hotel was near Seyyed Khandan(1) Bridge; the hotel is now demolished. It was an international hotel before war but after it was transformed to a temporary residence for the displaced people.

War stricken people especially from Khoramshahr and Abadan used to live there.

Tell us about war stricken displaced people upon their arrival to Tehran. Did they receive sufficient support?

During first months, the hotel used to cook for them and they had coupons but later War Displaced Population Headquarter provided those with young girls with essential items such as stove and fridge.

I even remember that there was a wedding and the halls were designed with color paper.

Were you ever tired of war wishing that war was over or did you ever hear rumors about a ceasefire? 

I clearly remember the day Khoramshahr was freed. We celebrated in the hotel. The feelings were two folded. We were happy that the city was freed and returned to our country but on the other hand we knew that many young men had sacrificed their life for this victory.

I was always paying that the war would be over and there will peace in the country and I believe there were many like me; but war situation is different and there are many strategic aspects to it which we don’t understand.

As the last question, what is the most difficult and horrible moment in war for you as a woman and as a mother?

The worst memory is from the missile strike on Dezful.

I remember that a woman came in with her son. The child was almost the same age of my first kid “Hooman”. He was injured by a quiver and he was holding his milk bottle in one hand and pretzels in another.

The mother was crying restlessly and when she saw me, she gave the baby to me and said: what am I supposed to do? I immediately took the kid to emergency room and shift doctor. He asked me to take him to surgery.

Then I returned to my shift and once it was over I went to check on him and I saw the mother sitting behind surgery closed door crying and praying.

I went in to see how things are going and I realized that they haven’t been able to save him; the feeling I had is beyond definition and I didn’t know how to tell his mother.

I came out speechless and I remember that I hugged her and we cried without saying a word and she realized that her kid is gone.

It was the worst day of my life and for a very long time I was thinking what if it was Hooman instead of that kid and I used to wake up in horror many nights after.

1.  “Seyyed Khandan” is a district in the eastern part of Tehran city (the capital).