Daughter of Sheena (36)

Behnaz Zarrabizadeh

Daughter of Sheena-36
Memories of Qadamkheyr Mohammadi Kanaan
Wife of Sardar Shaheed Haj Sattar Ebrahimi Hajir
Memory writer: Behnaz Zarrabizadeh
Tehran, Sooreh Mehr Publications Company, 2011 (Persian Version)
Translated by Zahra Hosseinian

I was in the ninth month of my pregnancy. Samad came back home and stayed with me ten days. But as if the baby wouldn’t want to be born. We went to the doctor and the doctor said that baby wouldn’t bear at least one week later. Samad took us to Qayesh. “I’m going to back to the front.” He said, “I’ll return in three or four days.”
As soon as Samad said goodbye, got into the car and left, the pain came to me.
I wouldn’t want to believe it. This time Samad had promised me that he will be with me when my baby is bearing. So I had to endure. I had to wait until he would be back. But the baby wouldn’t understand these things, rushing be born earlier. I writhe in pain, but I said nothing. Sheena realized it very soon. “I send someone to bring midwife.” she said.
I said: “No, it’s too soon.” she frowned and said: “If I don’t know when it is time, what use am I?”
She threw me bedclothes. She put a full of water pot over the Primus which was in the corner of the courtyard. Then she came into the room, sat down at the center and began to cut pieces of white cloth. She talked and looked at me with half an eye. Masumah and Khadija were playing at the corner of room. She would say terms of endearment to my babies and me. She would get up minute by minute, come to me and put her hand on my forehead. She would kiss my head and feed me different kinds of infusions.
Suddenly I felt ill. No longer could I tolerate. I cried of pain. Sheena placed pieces of cloths on the ground and went out to look for my sisters and sisters-in-law. Shortly after, the house was filled with people who had come to help. Midwife was too late. Sheena was looking after me. She fed me infusions and said: “Do not be afraid. If midwife didn’t come, I myself will deliver your baby.” It was afternoon when midwife came and after half an hour the baby was born.
Sheena happily embraced the baby and said: “Dear Qadamkheyr! It’s a boy. Congratulation! Look, how much chubby and white he is. How cute he is.” Then she sent someone to my mother-in-law to give reward for bringing good news. I took a sigh of relief when I heard baby’s voice. Although the house was very crowded, but a pleasure numbness and drowsiness came to me that I would hear no noise.
Tomorrow morning, my Haj Agha went out to find Samad in any way. He came back at evening, without Samad. He had seen one of Samad’s fellow warriors, asked him to find and gave him the news. From the moment, I looked forward for his coming. I thought that he would come home somehow the next day.
When tomorrow and after tomorrow came and Samad didn’t come home, I heard kinds of sarcasm and ironies: “Poor Qadamkheyr! She has given birth to a boy and her husband still hasn’t come to see her!”
- “What a carefree husband!”
- “Poor Qadamkheyr, now how she can return to her home with three babies.”
- “What a husband he is!”
Sheena also would hear these words and was kind to me more. Perhaps this was why she said: “If Mr. Samad comes himself so much the better, unless I myself threw party for my grandson.”
I had been a little overwhelming due to let my eyes rest on the door and had awaited. I got offended and burst into tears as someone said anything. Seven days elapsed from baby’s birth and Samad didn’t come. It was the ninth day. My mother said: “I don’t wait any more. I invite guests. If your husband comes back, so, it’s a pleasure to welcome him!”
In the morning of tenth day, Sheena got up and was busy cooking and preparing the lunch with the help of my sisters and sisters-in-law. It was near noon. One of the children shouted from the alley: “Mr. Samad is coming.” I was breastfeeding the baby. I lay him on the ground, tied a Chador around my waist, threw something over my head, and climbed down the long stairs hardly. The courtyard was crowded. My sister came toward me and said: “Why do you come out? You’ve just delivered.”
Then she took out her Chador and threw it over my head. I could not walk well. I went to alley slowly. A man was coming up the alley. He had been wore army clothes and carried a backpack over his shoulder. He was bearded and dusty, but wasn’t Samad. However, I went to the center of alley. He was Samad's friend. I greeted him with shame and asked about Samad. “He’s good.” He said, “I don’t think he would come back so soon. We have operations. I’ve also come to see my mother. I got informed she felt very ill. I'll back tomorrow.”
It is as if cold water was poured on my head. My body began trembling. My hands and feet were numb. I leant against the wall and stood there until he passed the alley and went. Sheena and my sisters had come into the alley to get reward from Samad. Seeing me on that situation, they held my arms to help me walk and took me into the room. I lay down in my bedclothes. All my body was shaking. Sheena solved some sugar in a glass of water and gave it to me and pulled a comforter over me. I pulled it over my head, pretending to be sleeping. I had had a lump in my throat. I knew Sheena still has sat beside me and cried. I did not want to cry. That day was my son’s party. I shouldn’t mess his party up.
At noon the guests arrived one by one. Women sat in the drawing room and the men went into another one. After lunch, my sister came and took the baby. They wanted to give him a name. Samad’s grandfather, Haj Agha Ibrahim, called him Mahdi. He himself recited adhān and iqama into Mahdi’s ears. Afternoon, the men said goodbye and left. It was Mordad and the cultivation season. But women stayed until evening. My sisters and sisters-in-law went into the courtyard and washed dishes and filled large platters with fruits. Mahdi was lying beside me. Women were busy talking with each other. I had still kept my eyes on the door and hoped it opened and Samad arrived at the last moment of my son’s party.

To be continued…