Exile at the Cost to Freedom

Compiled by: Islamic Revolutionary Website
Translated by: Fazel Shirzad

2025-1-23

Narrator: Mohtarmeh Ebrahim Kalarijani Savadkouhi - Qaemshahr / Researcher: Hadiseh Salehi

I was thirteen when I got married. My husband was nineteen years older than me. After marriage, my wife got a job in the municipality. Less than a year after our marriage, we decided to go to Damavand, where one of my childhood friends lived, and visit her. This decision determined the fate of my life and work, and here's the story:

When we arrived in Damavand, my friend said me, "There is a hospital here in Damavand, and by chance, they are looking for an employee. If you are satisfied, let's go talk to the director of the hospital. He even agreed that you would work at the hospital."

We went with my childhood friend and talked to the director. He also agreed that I would work at the hospital as an employee.

Now there was a big hurdle to overcome: my father. I had my wife's agreement, and there was no particular problem with this. I was sure that my father, with his religious fanaticism and the environment of those days of tyranny and monarchy, would not be happy with a young, newly married girl setting foot in an office or office environment; and that too in a hospital where men and women are mixed and they are not very careful about respecting the boundaries between intimate and non- intimate. In desperation, I raised the issue with my father; when he heard this from me, he flew into a rage and shouted angrily and said: “If you go to the hospital; the bread I have given you so far is as if I had given it to a dog! You should not work under any circumstances; get the thought of work out of your head!”

When I saw my father’s stubborn resistance, I said: “Dad! If you won’t let me, at least tell me the reason for your opposition!” He replied: “The reason is clear; everyone there is naked; when you set foot in the hospital tomorrow, in two days you will be naked like that piece of cloth!”

When he said this, I hit a nerve and fell at my father’s feet, kissed them and said: “Dad! By the One and Only God, as long as I am alive and have strength in my body, I promise not to take off my pants or shorten my sleeves; I will work in the hospital with this tied scarf; Dad! I promise, promise!”

In any case, I convinced my father to accept my work at Damavand Hospital.

At that time, the highest level of education was the fifth and sixth grades; I had studied up to the fourth. When my decision became serious, I prepared to take the medical assistant course. I completed this course and entered the nursing department.

As my revolutionary activities became more prominent in the hospital, Dr. Benaian called SAVAK and said: “A lady named Mohtarmeh Ebrahimi is carrying out revolutionary activities in our hospital and spraying pesticides; if you don’t move, she will kill all the hospital staff on the way!!”

A few days later, two or three people whom I had never met before came to me and said: “Ms. Ebrahimi! Get ready quickly, let’s go!” I said: “Where?!” They said: “Shut up! Just do what we tell you!” I replied: “At least let me call my husband; he’ll be worried!”

They stopped me from doing this and publicly scolded me, and one of them even cursed me!

But I kept insisting that I had to call my husband. When they saw my insistence, one of them slapped me hard in the ear and then took me away.

During the interrogation they arranged for me, a SAVAK officer named Purfarid greeted me with a baton and then asked his questions; questions like, “Why are you spraying pesticides? Who is Khomeini? Whose imitator are you?”

I refuted all the accusations as much as I could and said, “I don’t know Khomeini at all; what do you mean by imitator and imitator? I’m just hearing this now; how can I hide from you that I don’t have a high level of education; these things belong to educated people, not to me, who is illiterate!”

When PurFarid heard this from me, he raised the baton and brought it down to my waist, then someone came and took me to the basement of the building; a basement full of cockroaches and dirt. They also assigned one of them to torture me.

Luckily for me, the torturer turned out to be one of my neighbors; of course, I didn’t know him, and by asking me, he found out who my family and lineage were. His heart ached for me. He said to me, “Don’t be afraid! I have nothing to do with you; just so they don’t suspect, scream and say, ‘Don’t hit me!’”

Every time the baton hit the ground, my screams would rise to the sky and I would beg him to stop touching me.

After 24 hours, I called one of my colleagues who worked in the obstetrics unit and said, “Call my husband and tell him about the incident so he can stop worrying!”

My husband came to the hospital without delay when he heard this. The hospital staff pretended not to know and said: “We don’t know where he went; we suddenly saw him disappear!”

The next day, they took me to the interrogation room again. Porfarid was sitting in his previous place and was about to interrogate me. When he saw me, he cursed me a lot and said: “Father, so-and-so has become…”

Porfarid turned to me and said: “Come here and make a commitment!” I was mindful of what I had said 48 hours before the interrogation; so I repeated what I had said and said: “I told you two days ago that I am not very literate! You say write?! What should I write?” Purfarid said: “Now that you are not very literate, at least come and sign here!” If I signed, he would have smelled that my claim of illiteracy was a lie; so I replied: “I will point my finger.”

Finally, I signed a letter of commitment that they had written in advance and left the building.

They had been watching me for a while, and I could clearly feel it. Every month or so, they would bring me in and ask me questions.

***

After I escaped from SAVAK interrogation, I was under intense surveillance. In order to trap us in its information trap, SAVAK came up with an interesting idea; it had set up a vegetable and fruit stand along the route of my movement and that of the revolutionaries it suspected of having revolutionary tendencies, so that when we went there to buy fruit and vegetables, it could ask us questions to get to know our nature. However, the experiences we had gained and the warnings that some of them had been included in the announcements had tempered us considerably and made it difficult for us to fall into the trap of the regime and its agents.

In addition to selling fruits and vegetables, SAVAK also sold cloth and even beggars, seeking information from people and revolutionary activists.

One day, I went to buy vegetables when the owner of the vegetable stall saw me and started talking; for example, he said: “Mr. Khomeini, may God have mercy on his father; he won’t come to save us from these people and put things in order!”

In response to what he said, I would catch myself unaware and say: “Who is Khomeini you are talking about? We have never heard of him.” Considering the hijab I was wearing, he said: “You mean, with your religion and faith, you don’t know Khomeini? How could that be?!” I replied: “Where was our religion and faith? Our prayers are one in the middle. Let’s take our time, we pray; "If we don't find time, we don't bother praying; we're not very committed to prayer."

When he saw that I was not moving at all, he got frustrated with us and got busy with his work.

After I was exiled to the Roudhen Hospital for not taking off my headscarf and revolutionary activities, my situation became very bad; worse than the days of exile in Firouzkouh.

In Roudhen, the control over me was greater than before and my freedom of action was taken away. There was a gas station near the clinic in Roudhen. Two weeks had passed since I last saw my children and I missed them very much. I went to the gas station so that I could make a phone call to my children and my wife. I was sitting in a corner of the gas station; someone who seemed to be in charge there came to me and said: “My daughter! Something has happened to you; worry!” I replied: “I came to get some air!”

A smile appeared on the corners of his lips and he said: “My daughter! Since when has the gas station become a place to get air? Do you need anything?”

I frowned and said, “Did you think I was a beggar?!” I am an employee of the hospital here.” Hearing this from me, the man composed himself and said with more respect than before, “Please come and have tea in my room!” Since we were not related and it was possible that they would talk behind our backs later, I refused his request, but he insisted on his request. I asked God to help me.

The man asked me to tell the story of my coming to Roudhen. When I tried to move my lips, I started crying. I cried a lot. In the midst of my tears, I said, “It has been two weeks since I saw my two-and-a-half-year-old and my four-five-year-old; I miss my children so much.” When he heard this, he said, “My daughter! Have you been exiled here?!” I replied, “Can I trust you?”

When he saw my concern, he got up and brought Imam Khomeini's declaration and then said: "Do you trust this?" I said: "Then I can trust you." Then I explained the whole story to him, and finally I said to him: "Sir! I have a request for you; my phone is under surveillance; please call this number and tell my husband to bring my children here and see them for a few minutes so that I can refresh my mind."

Hearing this, his heart felt sorry for him and he said: "My daughter! Sit here in my office; I will go and get your children." I said: "It is possible that while you are gone, someone will come and my situation will be revealed!" He said: "Don't worry about that either; I have thought about that too; while I am gone; you go behind the curtain, then I will lock the door so that no one can enter my office; you can also wait for me and your children to arrive with peace of mind!"

It didn’t take a quarter of an hour before I saw him bring my children in the car. I hugged them tightly and refreshed my heart, then I said to the man: “I have caused you a lot of trouble; if possible, complete your kindness to me and my children and accept this money from me and buy toys for my children and return!”

The servant of God went and bought some toys for my children and returned, then put them in the car and took them back to their home, which was near the place of my exile, Roudhen.[1]